Worrying & Evangelism

I need to articulate my thoughts. I am now sensing a burning fire in me to share the Gospel. It’s not by my own strength. All I need is to pray and believe that God will do His work in me and in other people. Why am I so worried that my lifegroup wouldn’t be existent? Is there any benefit for me to worry? I can’t even control the number of white hairs growing on my head, or even add years to my life. Why should I worry now? I have seen the Lord provide. I have seen God soften hearts; bring people to Himself, all without my help. I believe that He will bring me to the people He has chosen. My role is to pray, my role is to continue growing, being available, and make sure I am worthy of Christ’s call. O what a wasteful life it is, storing up treasures in this earth, looking out for my own comfort above all else. I would rather give my life up for a cause. And no other cause could be bigger; in fact, everything in this world finds its own cause in the Creator. What an abundant life Christ has given us. What a glorious day to look forward to, when millions upon millions gather around the throne to worship. Father, I thank you for this reminder. Spirit, guide my next step.

Alright, i promise this is the last narcissistic whim i have.
oh, and i added a link to a blog by Jason Allen. This is the dude who's in charge of the BSU at my campus. Very cool thoughts.

Happy Birthday Mi and Di

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This post is for you. Have a wonderful birthday. I'm so glad you found a good church to plant yourselves in. Thanks for being patient with me. Thank you for a sacrificial life. I hope to reach the point in my life when I too, will be ready to give up comfort-of-home and hard-earned luxuries for the kids. =D I tell people i've got the best parents in the world. Though i don't tell you this, you can be sure it's the truth. i wouldn't have my life played out any other way but this.

2 Corinthians 12:10
That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Mark 4:17
But since they have no root, they last only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, they quickly fall away

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Love the Lord Your God. With all your heart. Soul. Mind. Strength. Love the neighbor as yourself. Sigh. Maybe I made a mistake. A terrible one... What if all this God-thing… this church thing… is nothing but crap? Why the doubt? Where is it coming from? Is it from within? Is this the “abundant” life I’ve chosen? Do I know any other way to live? Just 5 years ago, I would never have imagined my whole existence being transformed like this. I’m pretty sure it’s real. It must be. Gosh, but what if it isn’t? What if. Crap! Oh my dear SELF! You have chosen to remove yourself from your rightful place in the center of the universe! How will you survive? You no longer try to please man. But you are never going to find true happiness like that! Face reality; it’s a cannibalistic world… you have to keep the right people happy so that you can be happy. It’s messed up, I know. But there’s nothing you or I can do about it. Survival of the fittest… duh! Everyone knows that. What a mistake you’ve made. Let me describe the absolute horror. With one mindless prayer, you ripped out the natural person living inside, put him in the blender and turned on the LIQUIFY mode. You chose to put to death your own self. You cleaned out the comfy room you’ve lived in for so long. You (too hastily) threw out your old precious belongings outside and dumped gasoline on it. In just a split second you lit a match and made an enormous bonfire of precious history & heritage! YOURS! Dead is dead. You burn the life out of… you. And then in that now empty space, deep inside of you, you gently put in the “name above all names.” What’s in a name? Ever wondered? What’s in THAT name? You’ve never seen its bearer (he’s long gone); you have never seen its father. It is invisible, untouchable. You can’t grip the very hand you yearn to touch. You can’t see the face that you so long to see. Absolute torture! Would kind and loving person would do that? And yet you adore that Name, and hand it the reins of your life. You submit to it, revere it and worship it. You grant that Name permission to transform you from the inside out. All of it. My entire strength and your entire mind. Dead is dead. I am never going to come back. Are you sure of this choice? Could it be that you were on an emotional high when you made that choice? Look at yourself. Listen to what you are saying! Consider the risks you are taking. Look around you. People are living for themselves. In this world, I’ve got nothing but myself! I can only trust myself! Look, everyone is partying… making the most out of this short, stupid & hopeless life… and here i am, trying to be all “goody”; helping out the poor and unfortunate! Bah! Leave them alone (survival of the fittest, remember?)… take care of ME! Stop wasting precious time, I could be out getting drunk and having *** right now. Maybe I should eat and drink all I want, do whatever I want… for there is nothing more. How pitiful being a follower of “God”, believing in the things that I believe in. You are most pitiful above all men, 'christian.'

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read:
1 Corinthians 15





I struggle too.

As much as i dislike making my parents worry because I post so much "Jesus articles", I can't help it. I guess they are worried because it seems like i don't have a life outside this. Why can't i journal about my classes? or my studies, like a normal student? Or maybe the music i listen to? haha. well... so i will. I just bought the new Crowder CD! "When our depravity meets His divinity it is a beautiful collision." How about the books I read? Well, I just finished Tuesdays with Morrie (Mitch Albom) and will be starting on Mere Christianity (CS Lewis) soon. Oh. And I've got a Spanish Exam tomorrow. I had an Econ test on Wednesday. And i've got a great idea for my Honors Project! Yeah. And guys, stay tuned for A Lesson In Econ 2! I have a feeling its gonna be good. God bless. The next article I wrote is the result of imsomnia (or amnesia, as pundekchong puts it) a few nights ago.

Some pictures from the BSU girls' volleyball game, Warrensburg Flag Parade, and International Students.
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Zach

Friend. I don’t know where to begin. I am ecstatic. I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs. Feels like joy bursting out of me & I cannot help it. Will you let me tell you about Jesus? Not about religion, not about what you should change about yourself, or what you should start doing, nothing about that. All I want you to know is what Jesus Christ has done for me. I want you to know as much as possible, comprehend as best as you know how, all these wonderful thoughts swirling around in my head. I just saw a glimpse of the movie “Senior Trip” just now. In it, was this teenager typing a hundred lines of “I hate my life… My life is a joke” on his word processor program. No emotion; no smile; just emptiness in his eyes. Right now, let me tell you this, I can bet you a million dollars, even give up my life to tell you that “…my life is a joke…” IS a joke. In fact, it is worse: it is a terrible lie that many of us have fallen into. The world is depressed, friend. It is empty, having lost its purpose. Why else would you think it would try drowning itself in drugs, sex, booze & religion? But that is another story.

Do you know that uncomfortable feeling you have when you are unable to put into words something you are trying to say? Usually something which you are unbelievably passionate about? Yes, I bet you know it. When words can so fail you that the only sound you can muster up is a grunt… or a moan or groan? It’s sort of like a mixture of being happy, being in awe, and being absolutely dumbfounded. All of it (and maybe more) at the same time. Yes, that reaction.

What do I think of Life? Or Friendship? How about Love? Yes, now that’s such a common word… yet I wonder if you know what it means. How about Purpose? Ask me about God. Ask me how I feel about Community. And Music? All these are stunning creations. Feelings and Emotions? Nature? Humanity? Beauty? Ask me all about all this, please! All I would muster up will be those stupefied yet fulfilled "groans.” Those are my responses. To unwrap each word, I can take forever. And don’t get me wrong, I would gladly do it too... I am that sure. I am that convinced that “Life is NOT a joke.” Nothing happened by accident. I came to that glorious conclusion because of this one-man Jesus Christ. God in the flesh!

Now my life has meaning. It has Purpose. No, I take that back; it had always had a meaning and purpose! (We have just lost sight of it somehow) In fact, everything in this universe, big or small, visible or invisible, finds its purpose in God! Each breath of mine is an Adventure. Every new day, every struggle, every celebration, tear or smile has a place in the supernatural realm. I have seen it. I am savoring and experiencing every drop of it. This is a life with God. No apathy, no emptiness, no “chasing after the wind!” Freedom. Adventure. Worship. Discipline. Suffering. Obedience. Hope. Faith. Perseverance. The list will never end…

You have been created for so much more. You and I and all humankind. We are not on par. You play golf, don’t you? You know what I mean. We are waaayy below par; so inherently wicked, wretched and hopeless. The bible calls us “dead in our sins.” Just a side note: dead people cannot dig themselves out of the grave.

But.

But the good news is this: God will not let us be! Trust in Christ! Confess the truth: that you are in dire and desperate need. Take up His offer, I am begging you. Never in my life have I met a saved soul ever regret receiving life eternal. I don’t think you will be the first. Taste and see that the Lord is good. *groan*

Another Lesson from Econ

The class is currently at the chapter of Money. Chapter 29, to be precise. We have just breezed through the topics of Inflation and Unemployment. Not only that, the class had to sit for an Econ exam on Wednesday. Praise Jesus, I think I did okay. *relieved sigh*
“Money: the set of assets in the economy that people regularly use to buy goods and services from other people.” Hmm. I think I prefer Wikipedia’s definition: “Money is any marketable good or token used by a society as a store of value, a medium of exchange and a unit of account.” But of course, I do not profess to be an expert of money. Please do not ask me the meanings of M1, M2 or M3. However, you are allowed to ask my opinion about Fiat Money.

Fiat Money

The word ‘Fiat’ comes from Latin, which means “let it be.” It seems that most civilized countries today use fiat money: money without any intrinsic value. Simply means that the green paper bill you gave to Pizza Hut Dude for your dinner, is [in and of itself] as worthless as Monopoly money…or the cheap A4 legal pad you write your love letters on… or the soggy paper planes you made as a kid. Besides the cool designs and portraits of dead politicians, our cash is worth as much as the toilet paper you flush down every day. (Every 5 days, if you don’t eat fruits.)
But then came “let it be.” Then came some big shot who said, “Let it be… of value.” Let it be. From now on, man will fight and kill each other for this. Barter will be no more. It’s too hard to look for a double coincidence of wants. Instead, this coin… or this papyrus shall be your medium of exchange. These shall be the wages of your sweat and tears. Fame and glory shall go to the man with the thickest wad of green paper in his pocket. By law… let this be.

Then I started realizing that this “phenomenon” applies also to language and the written word. Let’s take the English language for example. 26 letters derived from the Latin alphabet. To a visually untrained infant, this article will look like a puzzling bunch of random lines, swirls and the occasional …dot. Which is not a flawed observation, in reality. It really is a bunch of scratches on a piece of paper, in and of itself. Just imagine being in a foreign country where no one has a clue what English is... or how it sounds like. Their spoken word could be as intelligible to you as the clucking of a hen. Likewise, your Oxford or Cambridge-trained “Queen’s English” would be as meaningful to them as the chuckle of a stinky hyena. This is quite amazing. Someone in history placed a tag on the letter “W”, (visually and orally) and decided to release air through his lightly pursed lips. Voila. We now have the sound of… [w]. *Applause*. Same goes for all the thousands of sounds we make everyday to communicate. Fiat sounds. Fiat markings.

The Seemingly Limitless Power of Word

26 symbols. Plus a system of spaces and dots and other markings. Ostensibly, Language seems to be rather limited. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. How staggeringly wrong can I be? An impressive arrangement of these “symbols” can last forever in a form of a quote. It could start wars. It could touch hearts, it could change the world. Now, do not forget that “they” are inherently worthless. Yet, “they” could be… priceless. Man invented plagiarism laws to protect these. In the beginning, He spoke… and the world came to being. Everything burst forth into existence out of God’s … word. Wow. Selah. Take a moment to digest that. With the invention of writing, man could now build on knowledge. Each generation can now accumulate data and build on the ever expanding trove of knowledge. Within centuries, man can write legends, create music, compose letters, build computers… step on the moon. Why did God choose to communicate through a book? Why is Jesus, the exact representation of the living God, called the Word? Why does the Bible call the tongue sharper than any double-edged sword? Maybe now you have an idea why. With this in mind, how can anyone NOT like reading? The whole process is nothing short of a miracle. Wow. Groan. Sigh.

I have not even begun talking about Music (doremifasolatido), Colors(RGB=W), Art and Humanity. Whan an amazing God we have. The whole earth is filled with His Glory.